Not Yet Married: The Pursuit of Joy in Singleness and Dating by Marshall Segal
If we thought about singleness the way God does, none of us would ever just “ settle” wanting to date, you never have to “settle” for singleness. it is not sin to marry — meaning men and women in love with Jesus can make. God is most glorified in us, when we are most satisfied in him. New videos uploaded daily. Subscribe today. Answer: The Bible does not directly address single mothers, but there are many examples of God's gentle interaction with women, mothers, widows and their.
I suppose it is just another expression of that age-old sin of thinking our value comes from how other people see us. Or another friend, who cannot tell me a single positive thing about herself but who is often quite thoughtfully supportive of her friends and family. But that would suggest that our value comes from what we do, which is just as bad as thinking that our value comes from what other people think of us!
Someone marrying you will not make you valuable. Doing things for other people will not make you valuable. You cannot be made valuable, because you already are valuable.
Not Yet Married: The Pursuit of Joy in Singleness and Dating
You are valuable because God Almighty himself tenderly created you—in his own image, no less! Getting married will fix all your problems This is probably the lie that I wrestle with the most, mentally. I could just get used to my husband, and that would be it. It is true that marriage is a solution to some problems, some of the time. Marriage can be an answer to loneliness. It might mean I can buy my own home. But this particular lie is one of those clever half-truths, where the truth makes it harder to see the lie.
There is actually no guarantee that marriage will fix loneliness. Some married people are incredibly lonely, trapped in awful marriages with no-one to talk to about it. But we must not fall into the trap of thinking that marriage will fix all our problems. Thank you so much, Hollywood, with all your stupid rom-coms, for helping Satan blind us with this lie. While it is true that God knows whether we will marry and whom we will marry, there is absolutely no way that we can know.
What does God have to say to single mothers?
All you can do is pray, make a wise decision, trust God, and then be faithful to your marriage promises. Look for someone who loves Jesus. Ask God for a husband, but also ask him to change your desires so that you will be open to the advances of a godly man, should they come. By the grace of God, both my parents are still alive and well, together with their respective spouses and a bunch of half- and step-siblings.
In my less trusting moments, I am afraid of getting old and lonely and having no-one to look after me. Chappo taught me to change the way I think about family. In a sermon he gave many years ago in his home church, he pointed out that our Christian family supersedes our biological family, just as it did for Jesus see Matt As children of God, we are part of a massive family.
The challenge for all of us, in our individualistic culture, is to act like it. Singleness can be a very painful and lonely experience. Perhaps you are toying with this idea yourself at the moment.
Let me tell you, slowly so you hear me: I know many women married to unbelieving men. Some of these women did not become Christian until after they got married. Others were Christian and married a non-Christian. Others have watched their Christian husbands walk away from Jesus. But not one of them would recommend choosing to marry a non-Christian while you still have a choice to make.
Not the women who still trust Jesus, anyway. You will eventually walk away from Jesus yourself, as he becomes less and less important and relevant in your life and your husband becomes more important.
And when you walk away from Jesus, you will have exchanged heaven for hell. Or you will keep trusting Jesus, but it will be difficult and lonely in at least some respects. I know a dear Christian lady whose husband no longer professes Christ, although he once did.
But every week, she goes to church and Bible study on her own. And, saddest of all, unless something changes between now and when her husband dies, she cannot look forward to standing with him before the throne of God in heaven for all eternity. He is going to another place. But when you marry a non-Christian I think you probably make it harder for him to take Jesus seriously. Of course, God is more powerful than your bad example, and he could still save your husband.
Given the previous two options, why take the risk? My favourite Jane Eyre quote springs to mind here. The man she loves is trying to persuade her to abandon her moral convictions and live with him, even though he already has a wife. She responds by saying: If at my individual convenience I might break them, what would be their worth?
For them, single life is just too hard and too lonely. To be perfectly frank, part of me wants to just shake them and tell them to look around—there are harder things than being single.
My heart breaks for women whose husbands have died. Some families live daily with incredible heartache and struggle because of illness or disability or poverty or tragedy.
I think their struggles would be much harder than mine. I also want these women to see how much they do have. They have good jobs. And if it is her own sin that has resulted in single motherhood, our gracious God is still just as willing to bring help and comfort. But often a woman finds herself alone and raising children through no fault of her own.
Sadly, women are often innocent victims of a world wracked by war and terrorism. Husbands go off to war and never return, selflessly giving their lives for their countries.
God cares about families. But He is more concerned that each person, no matter what her family looks like, repenting of sin and coming into a relationship with Him. He wants us to know Him, because His creatures knowing Him brings us joy and brings Him glory. We get bound up in the details of our lives, worrying what other people will think of us and whether the church will accept us and whether we have ruined things entirely.
But God calls the Christian to the joy of being above the weight of worry. He has said that we should cast all our cares upon Him, for He cares for us 1 Peter 5: He wants to carry the burden and forgive our sins and then forget about our sins and help us to move on.